Disclaimer: I own nothing. Harry Potter and all associated characters, places, spells etc. belong to J. K. Rowling. I am just borrowing them for a use I'm rather sure she wouldn't approve of. No money is being made.
Warnings: Spanking, Sex Toy, Magical Restraints.
Summary: Remus tells Severus a little white lie about muggle birthday traditions.
Author's Note: This fic was written in honor of Lupin's birthday, and because a certain someone had a really bad day. Any and all traces of plot have been ruthlessly expunged from this fic.
"You are to tell no one of this."
Remus smiled. "Of course not."
"I mean it, Lupin. Were it to get out that I was participating is such a bizarre custom..."
"And a muggle custom at that."
"I understand, Severus."
"Get on with it already."
Remus picked up the hairbrush and ran the bristles over the bare cheeks of Severus arse. Severus' cock thrust against his leg as the bristles scraped his entrance.
He raised the brush and brought it down. The sound of wood striking flesh echoed through the room. He started gently, listening to Severus count off each slap of the flat side of the brush against his arse, one for each year of Remus' life.
By ten, Remus was letting the blows fall rather hard.
By fifteen, Severus' arse was turning a lovely shade of pink.
By twenty, Severus was grinding his cock against Remus' leg with each blow.
By thirty, Severus' cries were drowning out the sound of the hair brush.
By forty Remus was ready to throw the brush aside and fuck Severus on the spot.
After the forty-sixth blow, the traditional one to grow on had fallen, Remus smiled at his work. Such a lovely shade of red, and he could feel the heat radiating off of it.
He knew it would be terribly sensitive. He flipped the brush over and gave Severus the gentlest of scrapes with the brush's bristles.
The moan that escaped from Severus was like music to his ears. Over eight years they'd been together, and he never got tired of it.
He reached down and pulled a condom out of the box on the bed, tore it open, and rolled it onto the handle of the brush.
Severus made an annoyed sound. "Can't we just skip the rest of this and get to the part where I fuck you?"
Remus laughed as he watched the condom lubricate itself. He pressed it against Severus' arse.
"Who says you get to fuck me?"
Severus moaned as he pushed it inside.
It was such a pretty sight. The white flesh of Severus legs and back framing the rosy red of his freshly spanked arse and the rich brown of the hairbrush as he thrust it into Severus. And he couldn't ignore the delicious feel of Severus' cock grinding against his thigh.
He felt Severus' movements grow more urgent, so he picked up the pace of his thrusts. He watched as Severus fisted his hands in the sheets. He listened as Severus moaned and grunted and growled.
Finally Severus buried his face in the mattress and groaned and Remus felt surge after surge of something hot and sticky spread across his thigh.
Severus looked up at him, panting.
"Take it out."
Remus nodded and slowly slid the brush out of Severus' arse. He waited a moment as the condom glowed blue, cleaning itself and preparing for the next round, then sat it on the bed.
Severus stood up.
"Did you think I'd let you get away with that just because it's your birthday?"
Remus laughed. "I thought you might."
Severus shoved him back on the bed and before Remus could do anything Severus was on laying half on top of him. He'd managed to angle his body so his hips were beside Remus, and Remus gasped when he felt Severus grip his cock tightly.
"You liked that, didn't you? Tricking your way into fucking me? With a hair brush, no less."
Remus started to answer, but the moment he opened his mouth, Severus started stroking his cock.
"Is there even such a thing as 'birthday spankings'?"
It was all Remus could do to nod as he thrust up into the strokes of Severus' fist.
"But I'm not the one who's supposed to be spanked, am I?"
Remus shook his head.
"Well, then, I think the nasty, lying little werewolf needs to get his, don't you?"
Remus groaned as Severus had left him.
Remus looked up at Severus.
"Roll over, or you can take care of that yourself."
Remus nodded and rolled over.
He jerked at the sting of the hairbrush striking his arse.
"Count," Severus said.
"One," Remus said.
The brush fell again.
Again and again. Remus counted, but after the first time he didn't dare thrust against the bed. Severus had stopped and when Remus promised not to do it again, Severus has started over at one.
When the final blow fell, Remus' arse burned so badly he could barely stand it.
Severus had no mercy. He leaned down and blew gently on Remus' reddened arse. Remus twitched and tried to jerk away from what felt like ice pressed to his skin.
Then he felt something press against his entrance.
"I can understand why you used this on me. The wood really is a stunning contrast to the color or your arse right now."
Remus moaned as Severus pushed it inside him.
"It's always about you, isn't it? I want to spank Severus. I want to fuck Severus with a hairbrush."
He punctuated each sentence with a thrust of the brush into Remus' arse.
"Did it now occur to you that I might have made plans of my own for your birthday?"
Right then, Remus didn't care. He just wanted Severus to make him come.
"Of course not."
Severus pushed the brush in and left it there. A moment later, Remus floated up off the bed and landed on his back. Severus was sitting next to him, a smug look on his face. Remus watched as Severus flicked his wand. His legs were pulled so far apart his hips ached.
Severus climbed between them.
"I mean to have my fun anyway," Severus said as he laid the wand aside.
He felt Severus take hold of the brush and start fucking him again. It was amazing, but it didn't even approach what he did next.
Severus leaned down and took Remus in his mouth.
Being fucked and sucked at the same time was... It was something Remus loved, but he was always too shy to ask for it, it seemed so demanding, but Severus knew.
God, did Severus know.
Each thrust of the brush drove him up into Severus' waiting mouth where a skilled tongue teased him. He gripped the sheets, desperately trying to hold it off, but there was just no way. After five or six strokes, he clenched his teeth and came.
He whimpered a bit when Severus pulled the brush out, but sighed in relief when the spell holding his legs was released.
A moment later, Severus kissed him, and he could taste himself on his lover's lips. It drew another whimper from him.
"Did you enjoy your present?"
Remus nodded. "Just what I asked for."
"Glad I could be of service."